HeartQuake!

Another night , another dream wasted on you. Not really a waste. I dont know how to explain it. But i just cant seem to understand it. Confusing. Painful. But somehow i dont feel the pressure anymore , im immune to this pain. I've broken myself countless times , yet i still feel the urge to do it. I wished i knew what state i am in , because i do not have a clue. Sigh , I wished i'd understood all of this. I wished i can escape this. But we all know that isnt gonna happen.

Dear Heart,
So black and I know that you're broken.
From words that she has never spoken.
So now our lives are laced with a tragedy.
We're drifting, dreamlessly, sleeping forever.
I won't fall for pretty girls any more.

I can't breathe when she speaks.
She tells me I'm not special.
She promised lines full of lies and a thousand roses.

Dear love,
My love I... I never knew eyes could cut like knives.
What a tragedy.
The blood on your dirty sleeve is drying and can't be washed away.
I've fallen on my knees too often.
If the only peace I can have is crying over your shattered picture.
I'll pick it up off the ground and sleep with the broken glass.

I can't breathe when she speaks.
She tells me I'm not special.
She promised lines full of lies and a thousand roses.
Our lives are laced with tragedy, a tragedy.
Her eyes are filled with lies.

Heart prepare to shatter. I am nothing special...
Heart prepare to shatter. Her eyes are filled with lies...

I can't breathe when she speaks.
She tells me I'm not special.
She promised lines full of lies and a thousand roses.
Our lives are laced with tragedy, a tragedy.
Her eyes are filled with lies.

She never knew… She was my only one, my only one.
And now I'll never love again.

Like uh. OMG WTF BBQ?

Today was so freaking ass boring man! Wanted to get out of the house , but nobody teman me , OH WELLS. Okay i practically dota-ed my heart out today. Lalalala. I so proud i only ate 2 meals today. Mmhmm. Some new diet plans! Rawr-ness!

Okay been searching for meaningful song lyrics these days. And i got this one. Really , really good.

Worth it? , By Sienna Skies

Sometimes we like to act with our actions before words
With something to fight against
Fight Against
But in the end we have to ask
Was it something to fight against?
Fight Against

Sometimes you see the light
You see straight through the fight and you know whats right
And you know whats right.
But then again sometimes its always dark and then we have to ask
"Was it really worth it?"

And every time we fight for whats wrong and right
We have to open up our eyes and see whats really worth it
And every time we die for something that we fight
Why do we live and lie for something really worth it?

Is it really worth it?

Only time will tell if we made the choice if this was worth it?
And then the lies will show that this all was right
And we were left to fight

And every time we fight for whats wrong and right
We have to open up our eyes and see whats really worth it
And every time we die for something that we fight
Why do we live and lie for something really worth it?
And every time we fight for whats wrong and right
We have to open up our eyes and see whats really worth it
And every time we die for something that we fight
Why do we live and lie for something really worth it?

Take my hand and we will fight for something
We will make sure it worth something
Will You stand by
By my side?
Will We Fight?
We will fight!
We will fight forever if we believe this is worth it
Will we fight?
If We Believe
We will fight
This is worth it
We will have no regrets
Have no regrets

They got the best shits man , really respect them , they and their trancecore/ techno metal stuff. Love em.

Cant wait for toy story tomorrow though! yeah! mmhmm! yeah! rawr!

And also , Not forgetting! HAPPY BIRTHDAY HUONGYI!

My macha since std 3 i think. Now he's kinda weird calling me wife BUT STILL!

JIN WEI TOO! I DIDNT FORGET! Known him for a long time too , since std 2 i think :D!

You guys rock :D

Lalalala! Thats all for now . Good Night World . *kisses*

Truest Of All Colours.

Sorry about the long pause . Penang was fun. Yeah! I was like going on 5 meals a day . Rawr! Some Char Koay Teow and Laksa . Mmhmm! Went to a place called Tanjung Tualang too! Ate some famouse seafood restaurant. Not too bad. :D

Life's been down lately though. Alot of complications came my way. And im trying to give my lall to solve every single one of them. I dont know why this things are happening but, yeah. Life what , WHAT TO DO? Threw shit at me , got some flowers back , now shits are puring again . Haha , some metaphors! :DD

I havent been posting any emo stuff lately , so here comes the emo that has been gone so long! LET IT POUR!

Okay , it starts with...

Here's a story about a guy (Guy A). This guy met this girl. Little did he know would become a big part of his life. Didnt like her at first. Thought she was like any other stuck up girl. This guy wanted to stay away , his friends all tell him so. HE didnt , he kept on talking and getting to know this girl. And yeah , he proved himself wrong , this girl wasnt no stuck up girl , she was an angel. He couldnt believe he could ever meet someone like her. He was ecstatic. He was a lonely guy. His friends were all working that time , but he got fired so he was alone . His friends were kinda busy so he did not go to bother them. So everyday he would look for her name on msn and talk to her instead. He felt a lot less lonely. He felt happy that someone like her would actually talk to him and accompany him.

Weeks past and the guy started falling for her. He would long for her texts everyday , he would think of her everyday befoer going off to sleep and she would appear in his mind first thing in the morning. Special she was to him , very special. Because he hasnt known anyone who would ever treat him the same way she did. She made him feel loved and needed. Something really rare for him , because outside of the family , he doesnt know anyone that would do the same. But his friends warned him , saying that this will only end in tears. They warned him to never fall for her , but their words came a little too late. He was already in love. Everyday , his aim is to make her smile. Her loved her smile. Sweet like an angel's they were to him. He loved it when she laughed and smiled. Because. He loved it when she was happy. And he told himself that he would do everything to keep it that way. A smile from her would make his day.

Months later. Another guy came along (Guy B) . So , well. He was a friend of Guy A. Guy A introduced him to her. Little did he know Guy B would fall for her. From that moment on , everything changed.

So , Guy A was as usual , trying everything to keep her smile going everyday. He started to love her more than anybody else. Well , he was just feeling the bliss of love because he doenst feel it often. He enjoyed every single bit of it. But , little by little , Guy B was getting closer and closer to her. Guy A knws but he did not stop it because he made her happy too , and above all else, Guy A wants her to be happy.

Guy A. He was tired, but he loved her . So , he still tried everything to be there for her for every second. He would run to her house just to give give her medicine because she had sore throat. He would do anything for her. (To me now , this guy was an idiot. Blinded by false promises of love.)

But soon, Guy B was getting closer by the minute . He was good. Guy A was jealous of course. Silently jealous. But still , he does not speak a word. He still believed his patience would pay off. ( WHAT A FOOL) .

Day by day , he grows weary. He knew he cant take the pain , but he still went on. He took everything in. He would look at them hugging from afar , while he waited for his , which never came. He would take long looks. He stand , stare and wait. He got hurt pretty badly , but he didnt care. His reason? Because he was able to see her happy. Above all else , he still wanted her to be happy , regardless of what pain he felt.

Then , the worst month came, She came to tell Guy A that she has fallen for Guy B. He was lost , his heart stopped. He did not know what to do. He wanted a way , but he couldnt find any, he was at a total lost. But he kept going. He didnt care , he believed he could still stand a chance. He still loved her. HE gave his all to keep her there.

Soon , he couldnt stand the pain any longer. He made a decision that , his patience cant win her heart because it was already been won. He gave up. He decided things would go on better without him anymore.

The End.

Rawr.







Ps. That Guy A is me. (:


Its a wonder, i dont mind playing guitar to a crowd, but when i try i sing and play to you , i cant seem to do anything. (:

Loved.

I was so freaking bored at home that i went out for this movie marathon yesterday, well i watched prince of persia and shrek. Both didnt really live up to my expectations. Prince of persia was rather bleak and shrek just lacked that 'comedy' factor. Sigh , i feel as lonely as ever. Im glad that nazrin and jeremy came. Great company :) .

Well today , woke up at 7.30 and went to play some futsal. I feel great as im feeling my legs again. ITs more flexible now , played with the usual sigma guys against the delta dudes + jack sen. Lawrence ,gilbert and nehe came later. Ate brunch at the HAJI BISTRO. Went back for more futsal. THEN WENT BACK TO HAJI BISTRO. and sat with soh , nehe ,lawrence , michael toh , kenneth , charissa , and some cheerleading people. My leg cramped during futsal. Epic, took lawrence 15 mins of continous pushing to ease the pain. Damn. Leon Jie got some death metal taste!. THEN I HAD THE MOST DISGUSTING LUNCH EVER. I ATE MURTABAK BAREHANDED ON THE BENCH. IT LOOKED LIKE DOG POOP! WARM DOG POOP! IT TASTES LIKE HEAVEN THO! :DDD

LIKE EWW RIGHT?!! TASTES GODLY!

haha , thats all for tonight! Signing off. Murtabak man! :D

What Will Be The Death Of Us All !

Had some serious dejavu just now. LIKE SERIOUS. Okay nevermind. I played football finally! Not even 5 mins people tackled my knee already! Walao wan kill me meh? haha . OH wells. Im happy im back on the field ! Oh i need painkillers for my leg again! DAMNED! haha oh well! Ate dinner at some chinese restaurant at ss 18. I think im falling for oldies again. Time to clear out some heavy metal songs. Cookies RULE! Wells. Nothing much to talk about. HOLIDAYS IS BORING! I NEED SOMETHING FOR ME TO DO BEFORE I DIE OF BOREDOM! Signing off , Goodnight! :D

Careless Whispers.

Okay today was fine again i guess. Better by the minute. Went to TJ Haus is ss18 for dinner. HAD LAMB. YUM YUM. hahaa nothing much happened today , so imma keep it short and sweet. Goodnight guys. Imma go dota sumore. or chat or fb , LIKE WHATEVER , Oh bitchy me :P . Wells. GOODNIGHT AGAIN! :DD

October & April

Jeremy introduced to me this really really nice and meaningful song called October & April by The Rasmus and SOME LADY.




October & April.


She was like April sky
Sun rise in her eyes
Child of light
Shining star
Fire in her heart
Bright as day
Melting snow
Breaking through the chill
October and April

He was like frozen sky
In October night
Darkest cloud
Endless storm
Raining from his heart
Coldest snow
Deepest thrill
Tearing down his will
October and April

Like hate and love
World's apart
This fatal love was like poison
Right from the start
Like light and dark
World's apart this fatal love was like poison
Right from the start

We were like loaded guns
Sacrificed our lives

We were like love undone
Craving to entwine

Fatal torch
Final thrill
Love was bound to kill
October and April

Like hate and love
World's apart
This fatal love was like poison
Right from the start
Like light and dark
World's apart this fatal love was like poison
Right from the start

Hate and love
World's apart
This fatal love was like poison
Right from the start
Light and dark
World's apart
This fatal love was like poison
Right from the start

October and April

Finally , I am. (:

Okay. I have decided that its destined to be. What you expect? I cant lay around emo and staring at the ceiling forever man. Sure there are emo periods here and there but well, I accepted the face that things will never be the same or what i hoped will never be. Yes, never. Things have changed and you've made your decision and i accpet it. I respect your decision. And yeah. There's still a special place in my heart for you , but yeah. This person makes you way happier and im happy that you're happy. Hate it when it hurts , but im kinda immune now already. All i can do , the best i can do is smile. Finally , I am . I am , immune to the pain , paste a smile on my face and take a walk 3 o clock in the morning with screamo songs blasting into my ears. Suddenly i love this song haru haru by big bang. Not my type of song but yeah. Its nice :D .

Went to Empire again omg. and Parade again omg. IM SICK OF PARADE ALREADY!! ZZ. What a place. Boring and FAGGISH! haha. Wells. I went with Alvin Teoh tho. The big sized dude. :D . Got some ice cream there. Haha. ICE CREAM RULEZ! I sound so fagggy!! EMPIRE SO SMALL. WHAT SO NICE ABOUT IT? :X . Oh Well.

..
CARRRIIIOONN!!! YOU TEAR ME FROM THE INSDE OUT YEAH~!!

Gimme the beat boys and free my soul , i wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away

♥

Oh well. Signing off. Still miss you tho. :'D

Darling , Would You Still Please Talk A Walk With Me?

Yes my heart beats for you as you're still the one , you still might be the one im chasing after. I wonder will you remember me forever? Wait , not forever , ever the same , and always will be might be a better word to put it.

Baby! why are you doing this to me?
Sweetheart! are those your eyes staring straight back at me?
Angel! I see your smile everywhere!
Darling! stop!

Night falls and Im running in circles
Im being chased by my imagination

Tell me Im forgiven say youll always be mine
Say that everything is over, tell me Im fine...
No one deserves to live like this!


I touch your lips and stare in your eyes
You smile and it makes me fly
You are the reason my heart beats
Tonight it's just you and me...

Night as dark as my thoughts
Sets the scene for my return
Lightning nips at my heels
As I race home
Wearily I stagger
Towards the song of her pale voice
Demons jeer my attempt
To be free

Tell me Im forgiven say youll always be mine
Say that everything is over, tell me Im fine...
No one deserves to live like this!



I touch your lips and stare in your eyes
You smile and it makes me fly
You are the reason my heart beats
Tonight its just you and me...

Windows cast her gentle reflection
Her somber silhouette dances for me

Look at you, you miserable fool!
Get off your knees, your prayers fall upon deaf ears
Gods turned his back on you, heavens gates are shut
And now youre knocking on the Devils door!

Ive been expecting you for some time, sir
Allow me to introduce myself
Im the one who pulls on all the strings, son
Youre lucky I dont kill you where you stand!
Dear God, it's her!

Tonight I raise my glass
This cant be real
For I know its time to move on a
My patience will not last
All hope has failed. Ive lost my soul.
Tomorrow I will be gone.

(':

Vindicated I am Selfish I am Wrong.

Okay. Had a nice day. Slept throughout exams again. Well. Retarded me again . Had home tuition with the coolest addmath teacher ever :D . He fetched me to Empire Gallery to meet up wita John. Met Ellysha , Anushya and Caryn there too. Walked about empire with John. Super small place. Dont like :P. Then i saw a hoodie that was worth 1k from Ed Hardy. Some crazy expensive shits there ! After that , we went and meet up with Trisha at MPH in Parade. We were actually beside her for 5 mins and well she didnt recognise me and John's SUPER loud voices. We then went to Dome for a drink. Went back MPH because Trisha wanted to get a book. Then we went for a tour in SAUJANA RESIDENCE . HUGE CLASSY ELEGANT CONDO. Two Thumbs UP! Love the place. Looks freaking ass cool :D . Gotta tell my dad to get me a unit there. Its SUPER COOL. Later took a cab back home. Missed dinner. OH DAMN. Then went tuition . Met up with Haseef , Kenneth Chan , Alvin Teoh and Kantavellu before that. SIGH. WHY TEACHERS LOVE TO AIM MY HAIR SO MUCH?

Signing off. Goodnight. Miss you. (:

Dobie Gray And Big Bang. My playlist for the night.

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zaPnOASOWIU) (GO LISTEN YOU'LL LOVE IT)

Drift Away
DOBIE GRAY
(Mentor Williams)

Day after day I'm more confused
So I look for the light in the pouring rain
You know that's a game that I hate to lose
I'm feelin' the strain, ain't it a shame

Oh, give me the beat, boys, and free my soul
I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away
Oh, give me the beat, boys, and free my soul
I wanna get lost in your rock and roll and drift away

Beginning to think that I'm wastin' time
I don't understand the things I do
The world outside looks so unkind
I'm countin' on you to carry me through

And when my mind is free
You know a melody can move me
And when I'm feelin' blue
The guitar's comin' through to soothe me
Thanks for the joy that you've given me
I want you to know I believe in your song
Rhythm and rhyme and harmony
You help me along makin' me strong

What's Happening In The Backyard? Oh Nothing, Its Just The Apocalypse.

Okay. I have to admit that yes i still do very stupid things. Today. I stuffed a lighted cigaratte right into my middle finger. Damn freaking pain. Its gonna leave a mark :( . Sigh. What i did today? Nothing. I feel useless like shit. Laying down on the bed like an idiot. Hugging my winnie. Guess thats the closest thing to me now. Besides my guitar WHICH I ALSO HUG. I feel lonely as ever nowadays. My days are empty. My phone is no longer with me all the time. I feel terrible. I miss old times. I miss filling my days with emotions like happiness, sadness or something , at least i felt something. Now its just empty. Its just not the same anymore. It'll never be the same anymore. MY finger hurt like shit okay. It got this giant blister on it CRAP. AND HELL ITS GONNA LEAVE A SCAR.Oh wells. Emo time. :'( .

I never said I'd lie and wait forever
If I died, we'd be together
I can't always just forget her
But she could try

At the end of the world
Or the last thing I see
You are
Never coming home
Could I? Should I?
And all the things that you never ever told me
And all the smiles that are ever ever...
Ever...

Get the feeling that you're never
All alone and I remember now
At the top of my lungs in my arms she dies
She dies

At the end of the world
Or the last thing I see
You are
Never coming home
And all the things that you never ever told me
And all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me
Never coming home
Could I? Should I?
And all the wounds that are ever gonna scar me
For all the ghosts that are never gonna catch me.

Is it my turn to die?
My heart is pounding as I say goodbye
So now I dance in the flames
I love you crying and screaming my name

You said that we’d be forever
How could you kill me and lie to my face
Now that we can’t be together
There’s just no hope for our final embrace
So here we are, I’m in your head
I’m in your heart!!!

If you were here I'd never have a fear.
So go on live your life.
But I miss you more than I did yesterday.
You're so far away.
So c'mon show me how.
'Cause I mean this more than words can ever say.

You're beautiful!

Well I'm a total wreck and almost every day.
Like the firing squad or the mess you made.
Well don't I look pretty walking down the street.
In the best damn shirt I own?

....
........
.............

Goodnight , Missing you more with every passing second.

Days come and go , But my feelings for you are Forever.

Lalala. Why am i an active blogger? Cause i need to let alot of stuff out before i explode into pieces. Need a life filled with happiness. Now is like 18.23% filled? :D . I live specific numbers :3 . YOU KNOW WHAT. I LOVE SS15 PORK MEE , YES THAT FAMOUS ONE. Woo shit. Tastes GODLY MAN. YES SLEEPING THE WHOLE DAY IS MY JOB AND I DONE THAT JOB PRETTY WELL. (: . TODAY. i seen some dude's face that can give me nightmares. EPIC. WHATS EVEN MORE EPIC IS. i didnt drink water when i wake up so my mouth is like super dry. Then i was so hungry that i stuffed meehoon and my mouth. AND IT CHOKED ME. ZZ. I couldnt swallow the freaking thing. My throat was stuck. With meehoon. What an embarassment D: . Great. Fill my life sorrows , then blast it out with pure embarassment? Great. Thanks alot :D .

FISH AND CHIPS , BURGER AND FRIES , STEAK AND BAKED POTATOES , SIVIKS AND PENDIDIKAN JASMANI , MILK AND COOKIES , PAPER AND PEN , T-SHIRT AND JEANS , SLACKS AND LOAFERS , WINNIE THE POOH AND (TIGGER,PIGLET,RABBIT,KANGA,ROO,EEYOR,OWL,BEAVER,AND THE KID WHO I CANT REMEMBER HIS NAME)Ps. Dont Forget them honey! And lastly, You and Me. (':






Signing off. I miss you and your hugs. Goodnight World.

也许爱情浸在风里打转,离开释怀 等断肠又重来

Erm yeah. I just woke up. Wow. My hairsyle ROCKS when i wake up :3 . Rebuilding myself has been a hard process. Never can be an easy task during the process. My heart seems to beat harder. and my smiles seem to be getting wider again. My face still fells like paper because of excessive use of pimple cream ! :D . Reduced pimples with the effects of dry flaky hard skin IS FINE :D . Playing guitar alot lately. Geetting back some skils :O . I rarely see the light of the day because i spend most of my time sleeping :) . I know damn lifelesss. BUT IM ALIVE AT NIGHT :DD . Spend my time dotaing or cod-ing or fifa-ing and online dont forget that :D . I need BRAMLY! WEELALALA.

Okay signing off. Need to wash clothes. YES I WASH CLOTHES :D